The Stuff of Family Legend

This Thanksgiving, my family all gathered at Lake Gaston and had the most fabulous time together. We laughed. We told stories. We ate a ton of food.And, we played innumerable games of pool. It was amazing because we were all together.Thanksgiving2013But, all these wonderful moments are not why this vacation will go down in family history. No, this vacation will go down in history because this was the moment that Steve and his family came to stay.

For the longest time, Gabriel has had his little group of imaginary friends. Since Gabe and his brothers discovered Minecraft a few years ago, Steve has become the most talked about and prominent imaginary friend in the crowd. Slowly, over time, Steve became less the character from Minecraft and he developed a personality and a family of his own. We heard all about Steve’s sister, Lisa, and his older brother, Villager (I don’t think Steve’s parents liked Villager that much. He’s the only one with a weird name) but we almost never heard about Steve’s parents…until Lake Gaston.

While we were at Lake Gaston, Gabriel was following my sister, Becky, around and chattering non-stop about Steve . Well, one time, Gabriel followed Becky when she went outside to smoke…and, that’s when Steve’s mom entered t he picture. All of a sudden, Steve’s mom had every bad habit Aunt Becky had only it was a million times worse. If Aunt Becky smoked one cigarette, Steve’s mom smoked about a thousand more cigarettes and cigars. Gabe was driving Becky crazy…and, Becky decided she could either let it bother her or she could turn it back around and have fun with it. From that moment on, if something went wrong, Steve’s mom was to blame. Miss a shot in pool, that damned Steve’s mom bumped into you. Break a wine glass, that bitch, Steve’s mom, caused the party foul that ended the fun. We were laughing so hard it made us cry and, for some reason, it was even funnier when the talk of Steve’s mom drove Marty or my dad crazy. I think the epic moment of the vacation was when my dad finally joined in and blamed Steve’s mom for something.

As this all went on, someone asked Gabe about Steve’s dad. I don’t even remember who asked but I do remember Gabe’s response. “Oh, Steve’s dad doesn’t live with them. He was in the military and was killed in the war.”

See, the back story was growing.

Well, when we got home from Thanksgiving, Gabe was back in school and they were preparing for their Winter Holiday Concert. Suddenly, Gabriel started talking about Steve going to school with him and singing all the songs with him. One day on the way home from school, Gabriel issued the grand pronouncement that Steve and his family celebrated ALL the holidays…Hanukkah, Christmas, and Kwanza. I couldn’t resist. I had to delve into this a bit further. I asked him if Steve’s family was like my friend Rys’s family…were they Messianic Jews? He quickly said that Steve and his family were like Rys’s family…that they followed many tenets of the Jewish faith but they also believed Jesus was God’s son.

So, we’ve established Steve’s family’s religious beliefs.

I had to ask him about the Kwanzaa celebration. Up until this point, I had thought Steve’s family was white. I don’t really know why but that’s what I thought. So, I said, “Well, you know Gabe, usually Kwanzaa is an African-American holiday. Wouldn’t it be unusual for Steve’s family to celebrate Kwanzaa?” Gabe told me that “No, they celebrate Kwanzaa because Steve’s dad was black and they celebrate it even though he was killed in the war.” He further clarified that Steve’s mom was white like me.

Check…we now have a family of interracial Messianic Jews who are our imaginary friends.

I desperately tried to suppress my giggles the rest of the drive home from school. Thank God it is a short drive. When I talked to my other sister, Keri, a few days later, I was laughing and telling her about this. That is when I found out the legend of Steve’s mom has spread. Evidently, my two nieces were telling their friends about our vacation and all the family craziness including the development of Steve’s mom. Now, my sister has this group of teenagers that will text her at random times blaming Steve’s mom for whatever is going on.

I don’t think Steve and his family are ever going to go away.

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Since Christmas, there have been further developments in Steve’s family. At one point, Gabe informed me that Steve and his family were going to live with us for a week or two. Steve’s mom finally gained a name. Her name is Samantha. His mom is still committing horrible party fouls. She spilled a few things at the New Year’s Eve party and nearly broke another glass. Also, we learned that Steve has a little sister named Angie (see what I mean…all the kids have normal names except for poor Villager) and, to quote Gabriel, “Steve also has a bratty little brother who ran away and lives with another family.” We asked him if the little brother was ever coming back and Gabriel said he didn’t think so.

As you can see, the legend of Steve has grown and spread. I almost can’t wait to hear what Gabriel comes up with next.

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Have you ever had something pretend take on a life of it’s own like this did? Please tell me you did and it’s not just my families weirdness that cause stories like this.

3 Responses to The Stuff of Family Legend
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    January 10, 2014 | 11:53 am

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