Even my accidents are abnormal

I’m weird. I like being weird. I frequently tell my kids that life is a lot more fun when you let weirdness into your life. But, why, oh why do even my accidents have to be weird?

My crafting has been at a halt since mid-day on Sunday. I was sitting at the computer minding my own business and here is what happened…

Joey: Mom, there is a knife stuck in the drawer.
Me: What do you mean there is a knife stuck in the drawer?
Joey: sounding slightly frustrated There is just a knife stuck in the drawer. I don’t know how to explain it. Just come look.

So I got up and took the very short trip into the kitchen. I looked in the drawer and thought, “Damn, the kid’s right. That knife is definitely stuck. Picture an open and empty drawer. Now, do you see the seam down the back…the spot where the back of the drawer and the bottom of the drawer meet up…the spot that is too narrow to even slip a dollar bill through? Well, somehow (be damned if I know how) the tip of a sharp knife was stuck in that seam.

Me: Don’t worry Joey. I’ll get it.

Surely it can’t be too hard to get out of there. So I reached in, grabbed the handle, and gave it a tug. Bwahahahahaha, if only it had been that simple. The knife didn’t budge. Did I take a a step back and reevaluate? Did I clear all the other knives, the silverware tray, or the sharpening stick out of the way? Did I stop to think what would happen if I pulled harder and the knife didn’t come out? Did I stop to think what would happen if I pulled harder and the knife did come out? The answer to all those questions is a resounding “HELL NO!” I just pulled harder.

The knife came out of the crevice it was stuck in and another knife went in…into my hand that is. When the knife came loose, my hand rebounded right into the very sharp point (have I mentioned I like sharp knives) of a knife. The point of the knife went in about1/4 to 1/2 inch in the area marked on the picture below.

not my palm
Luckily, it went straight in and I pulled it straight out so I didn’t have to go get stitches or have it glues shut. It hurt like hell and the hand is still very, very tender. I was able to censor myself and keep the worst part of what I wanted to say inside. The only thing that saved me from spewing lots of bad words was the fact that my kids were so worried about me already.

See, even my household accidents are weird.

13 Responses to Even my accidents are abnormal
  1. Another Dreamer
    September 14, 2009 | 9:35 am

    Eeeek! Glad you weren’t hurt more seriously than that, but still… ouch. Hope it feels better soon!

  2. nancy
    September 14, 2009 | 10:22 am

    Oh no! If it were me, I would have spewed all those curse words. My kids hear me curse on a daily (hourly) basis. I’m terrible.

    I hope it feels better soon!

    And not to hijack your post, but I ~have~ to tell you how I stabbed myself in the very same place! …

    I cut open an avacado and I had the half with the pit in my hand. This is before I knew the right way to get the pit out (“karate chop” the pit with a knife, twist, remove) and I used to just stab the thing with the tip of a knife. Yeah, not so bright. So I bring the knife down in a stabbing motion, it slips on the pit and goes right through the side of the avacado, right into my hand. I stabbed myself! (next scene was lots of blood and me running into the backyard to get my husband who was watering the grass)

    Heh. Again, sorry for hijacking. 🙂

  3. Lynn
    September 14, 2009 | 10:40 am

    OMG! Glad the injury wasn’t too serious! Well done for keeping the curse words to a minimum. You’re a better woman than I, lol! I had an accident yesterday as well (took the tip of my right pointer finger off and busted the nail while moving a window unit a/c….long story) and fortunately there were no little ones around because the ugly words just flowed!

    Hope your hand gets better very soon!

  4. battynurse
    September 14, 2009 | 11:25 am

    Is it bad that I’m sort of chuckling a little because this seriously sounds like something I would do? I’m sorry you got hurt though, that part sucks.

  5. Sheliza
    September 14, 2009 | 11:39 am

    I’m weird too! I’m glad you are okay and I would have said quite a few unpleasantries inside too!

  6. Carrie27
    September 14, 2009 | 11:58 am

    Ouch, ouch, ouch! I flinched thinking about the pain you had to have been in. I probably would have fainted!

  7. Beautiful Mess
    September 14, 2009 | 12:20 pm

    OH NO! LOL I’m laughing only becuase that sounds like something I would do. Who needs to “think things through” when all you have to do is pull harder, right? Hope it feels better soon!

  8. Dora
    September 14, 2009 | 3:57 pm

    OWWWW!! Hope it feels better soon!

  9. Nina
    September 14, 2009 | 4:22 pm

    Ummm, when did you last have a tetanus shot? Oooooowwwwwww! That’s all I have to say. I hope you heal up ok!

  10. Billy
    September 14, 2009 | 6:14 pm

    Ouch! Hope it heals soon, and doesn’t leave a scar!

  11. becomingwhole
    September 14, 2009 | 7:02 pm

    Also sounds like something I would do…so glad you didn’t have to get stitches…so sorry you got hurt.

  12. Aunt Becky
    September 14, 2009 | 11:06 pm

    I’m pretty certain that you and I are soul sisters somehow. TOTALLY something that I would do/would happen to me.

  13. Meari
    September 15, 2009 | 4:36 pm

    Ouch. I can feel the pain from here! I’m glad it wasn’t worse than it was.

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